If you’ve been to IKEA then you’ve probably seen their assortment of Swedish food they keep near the cash registers (which I always thought was weird, that they store it in front of the cash registers, so you see it after you’ve already purchased your Billy bookcase. So if you happen across a craving for some Lingonsylt after you have checked out, you have to get back in line–this is dumb). But what is not dumb is their amazing packaging of food products:


Coffee in a box

Here’s some creamed smoked roe with a little boy smiling as if to say, “I love roe from a tube, don’t you?” To which we reply, “ugh, I…uh, well, um…”

Food from a tube is so convient


Is that Christie Brinkley?



We rarely leave Ikea without buying Marabou. It’s my favorite.


A Swedish Food bag in which to place all of your Swedish food selections.

I Have Never…

  • seen Gone With the Wind
  • been to middle America; this includes but is not limited to Oklahoma, Kansas, Louisiana, and Montana
  • witnessed my grandma put on make-up on
  • done drugs
  • been to Ikea or Target without buying something
  • broken a bone
  • dyed my hair black
  • finished a cross word puzzle
  • gone skinny dipping
  • been able to flair my nostrils