Phantom Poo Residue

I still feel like there’s poo on my right index finger.

Like there’s a little smudgie right there next to my fingernail; where I keep the hangnails and dried skin calluses.

I changed Hudson’s diaper over an hour ago, and have washed my hands twice since then with lots of foamy soap and really hot water, but for some reason I can’t shake the the feeling that there is a phantom poo residue, sitting next to me, on my finger.

If it was really there, I’d don’t think I’d be typing with this much enthusiasm. Or at the very least, I wouldn’t be using the right index finger. I’d be holding it up, high above the keyboard like an impish floating fariy, supervising the work of the other 9 poo-less fingers.

I definitely would’t be scratching this blackhead that is right above my lip and below my nose with such abandoned vigor.

I certainly wouldn’t be using my right index finger to extricate the remaining hummus out of the container, and then licking shamelessly.

I wouldn’t be biting the rouge hangnail on said finger, and then chewing the torn off skin between my front teeth before I savored the flesh, and then spit it across the room.

Certainly not.

But just as a safety precaution, I think I’ll wash my hands a third time.

 

6 thoughts on “Phantom Poo Residue

  1. I can still tell you exactly where the poo was on my finger last week. Or maybe that was hummus. They look the same.

    Did I just ruin hummus for you?

  2. Totally get what you mean. Happened with me last week picking up dog poo. is that worse or better than baby poo??

    just found you blog. how refreshing you are. Thanks.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>