It’s all quiet in the house.
Berlyn is napping.
Hudson is napping.
Zoey is napping. Or contemplating a fart. Or eating the crotch of the underwear I wore yesterday. Well, whatever she’s doing, she quiet.
I think I’ll take a nap too.
But I have to sleep on the couch downstairs, because that’s where Hudson is sleeping. Except the couch downstairs isn’t as cozy as my bed. And it smells like dog farts. And there’s crusty breast milk on the arm rest. Don’t ask me how it got there. I don’t know.
I’ll bring my pillow and cozy duvet down.
My eyes are closed. I should be sleeping by now.
Hudson hasn’t moved in a while, maybe I should make sure he’s breathing.
*Carefully high five Hudson*
Okay, now I’m going to sleep.
Here I go. Deep breath, aaand start sleeping, NOW!
Ohh, I have an itch on my shin. Better get that or else it will bug me.
Now my cheek itches.
Okay, I’m seriously tired. **YAWN** I’m going to fall asleep now. Here I go…
Oooh, the sun’s in my eyes. I’d better close the shutters.
My boob itches
Maybe I should take off my watch, I’d be more comfortable with my watch off.
There, that’s better.
Is my phone turned on vibrate?
I would hate it if someone called me right now.
I better check.
Oooh, I got some emails.
This one is from Rachel Zoe. She’s suggesting I buy some Chloe gladiator sandals.
I’ll think about that, Rachel Zoe.
No, wait…I have to pee.
I’d better pee, or else I’ll never fall asleep.
Ahh, that’s better. Now that I’m all cozy on the stinky couch, it’s time to sleep.
Hudson’s awake. I have to feed him.
Well, that was a nice nap.