My Round, Smooth Surfaces

The photo in the masthead of this website makes me giggle. Not for obvious reasons, but for one very brown and blotchy reason. See that discoloration to the right of my chin? Yeah, the one you probably thought was shingles. Well it’s a hickey. From Pat you ask? Well, that would be sweet–and a little strange that my husband would suck on my face for foreplay. But no, we’re not that weird. It’s a hickey from Berlyn. She was about 7 months there, and during that time she went through a phase I’ve entitled, “OMG! Mommy Makes Milk!” Of course Berlyn always knew this, but I think the idea really settled in for her around this time. Her line of thinking was simple: because mommy makes milk, then I can suck anywhere and get milk, right? WRONG. Berlyn you are very wrong. She would latch on to me anywhere she could, but she preferred my round, smooth surfaces. My chin being one of her favorites, and my bare shoulder. I would always intercept her as quickly as I could, but even if she sucked my face for 2.3 seconds, I would quickly develop a hickey. The plus side to this is that she no longer cried when she was hungry. Nooo, instead she’d come at my round, smooth surfaces with this strange gleam in her eye, and like a leach, would suck—slurrrpp.

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