I Have to Write a Book First


April 7, 2009

I want to go on a book tour. 

I guess I’d have to write a book first. 

But what would I write about?

I can’t give advice, I haven’t been through enough to warrant myself as an authority. 

I don’t have anything meaningful and inspirational to talk about. 

I think the most appealing thing about writing a book is the fancy book tour. 

I’d stay in Four Seasons all over the country, be jet-lagged, wear dark sunglasses, and order eggs benedict from room service. But  chances are, when I get to the book store there would probably only be two people in line, and they’d be all, I heard there might be free slushies


My book sucks, and I haven’t even written it yet.


i’d buy your un-subjected book but i have to admit, an alcohol signing sounds like the kind of party you should have.

by gorillabuns on April 7, 2009

You should just go on tour. Don’t even worry about writing the book.

by dgm on April 8, 2009

After thinking long and hard about this, I have a plan: you can write a book about MY fascinating life, and we can go on tour together. Kind of like show and tell. It’s genius, I know.

by Amanda on April 8, 2009

I think you could write about indoor plumbing and it would still sound kickass…

by Kelly on April 8, 2009

Don’t give up. Two people in line for that future book tour are two more than are waiting in line for you now. See, how you can spin it?

by blueviolet on April 9, 2009

Oh, please write a book.
A) I would totally read it.
B) I would buy multiple copies and give them as “just for the heck of it” gifts, limiting my target visits to once a month.
C) I would be first in line for your book tour, my own slushie in hand. Preferably Blue Raspberry.

by Natalie on April 11, 2009

Ooooooh, a book tour. That sounds juicy.

Maybe you could write about a woman who really really really wants a book tour.

I’d buy it!


Good luck!

by SuZ on April 13, 2009

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