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August 11, 2008

I’ve been writing my blog for a year on August 22!! Yeah me! And to celebrate this momentous occasion I have decided to highlight my favorite posts (one daily for a week) for all you to read and enjoy all over again. It’s going to be so much fun!

Then I got to thinking, with the help of this person, that perhaps I should let you guys choose your favorite! So peruse my archives and tell me what your favorite post was by leaving a comment or emailing me!

Here’s number 5:

Survival Skills

Zoey and I were on a walk this morning. Pat was in the shower and Berlyn was busy with her mid-morning nap.

So there we were, my pug and I, trotting along. I was unashamedly wearing bright pink plaid pajama bottoms and my face-washing headband while holding a bag of poo. And I couldn’t help notice that there was a hawk over head that wasfollowing us. Are there even hawks in Southern California? Whatever it was, it was a big-ass bird.

My mind wandered to a dark place, and I thought about what I would do if it decided to eat Zoey. I don’t blame the bird for wanting to eat my dog. Pat and I have had several conversations about which piece of Zoey we would eat in a crisis. I would choose the hind legs. She has meaty legs.

So, hypothetically, if the hawk swooped down and starting pecking at my sweet dog, my guess is, I would probably punch the bird in the face. I’m doing my tae-bo almost every day, and I’m getting really good at the right-hook and upper-cut. While the bird is disoriented, I would throw the bag of poo at him, and then duck into a bush until it flew away; either a bush or a moving car. But car would have to be nice, not like a Suzuki Sidekick or a Kia Rio. I would not get in a Kia Rio, I don’t care what type of danger I was in. No Kia Rio!

This is all in my mind, of course. The reality is, Zoey and I have absolutely zero survival skills. So what would really happen is, I would run in the opposite direction, and let the hawk feast on my dog’s meaty hind legs.

6 Comments:

How can I choose just one? I can’t, so I won’t.

There’s your great anniversary post.

I love the 25 Things post also — is it weird to learn things about you from your blog instead of real life?

And of course there’s the multiple great posts about our adorable daughter.

Selfishly, I enjoy your Iceland post also. We’d better get planning!

by pat on August 11, 2008

“Are there even hawks in Southern California?”

Oh my, yes. We live on a canyon and see lots of them every day. That’s one reason our cats are confined indoors (that, and coyotes and pumas, etc.) As for a hawk taking on Zoey, I’d say count on it! Only it would swoop-and-grab rather than hunker down on a leg right in front of you. So any dreams you have of punching a hawk in the face are wild delusions, my friend. That hawk would probably carry off your little ass, too. I suggest staying inside to live out your days.

by dgm on August 11, 2008

your husband is so sweet 🙂

by Jenielle Krusiewicz on August 11, 2008

Ok, so my favorites are:

A Sordid Love (It was genius!! and so original)
… but I love the transparency and vulnerability of “Walking is so over-rated.”

by Jenielle Krusiewicz on August 11, 2008

I have to say that I loved the entry about going to the 99 cent store where you wrote in English and Spanish. Oh, and I second the nod for A Sordid Love. 😉

by amanda on August 12, 2008

A couple weeks ago we had our cockatiel, (Sunny) and parrot (Lucky) sitting in a bushy tree right next to us in our front yard when all of a sudden, Sunny decided to exit the bush and flutter down to the sidewalk. (He can’t actually fly because his wings have been clipped.) My husband immediately got up to get him and all of a sudden there was this huge hawk between my husband and Sunny. The hawk swooped down and grabbed Sunny. He flew across the street to the neighbor’s driveway (with my husband racing after him and trying to scare him off). The hawk proceeded to drop Sunny and then picked him up again and flew back across the street where he dropped him again on a lawn. My husband was still on the chase. By this time, Sunny had managed to go under a bush in the yard and my husband picked him up. The hawk sat in the nearby tree and watched as if just waiting for another chance. In the meantime I had taken our parrot indoors as well as our small dog. When my husband walked into the house with Sunny still in one piece, I couldn’t believe it. Evidently the hawk never had a good grip on Sunny due to Sunny’s squirming and my husband’s chasing. The only damage done to Sunny were a few tail feathers missing which have now grown back. Sunny seemed very quiet and traumatized for about a week, but has since recovered and is his usual little self. He still talks and plays peek-a-boo with us, but he doesn’t get to go outside with us like he used to do. We’re just grateful that no real harm came to him. We have always seen hawks soaring high above the neighborhood but never thought one would have the nerve to swoop down when we were in such close contact with our birds. Now we know we were wrong!

by Marlene Haerle on September 4, 2008

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